I called D's grandmother to wish her (and the rest of the family who were sure to be congregating at her place) a healthy and happy new year. Here's the transcript:
Me: "Hi Grandma, happy new year!"
Grandma: " Hi, dear. We were just talking about you."
Me: "Well whatever I am being accused of, I didn't do it."
Grandma: " Obviously."
Me: "Huh?"
Grandma: "We were just wondering when you were going to get pregnant again. So, as I said, obviously you didn't do it, dear."
Well played Grandma, well played! Nothing like being out sassed by an almost 90 year old. I hope I'm just as awesome in 50+ years.
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